lousy

everything is lousy...so lousy that i haf to blog...
yes it's been quite a while since i blogged... and only when i got loads of unhappiness to vent then would i blog....well...sort of...

it's the hols and for this time round, instead of engagin into lab work last the last one, i decided to skip lab totally this time. partly coz most lab mates r not around.. and also coz i can plan my own activities! juz to enjoy!!

but little do i realised that the amt of things i had in my schedule is not enough to fill my hols...i shld haf known earlier, in fact i already know. i thought i will be able to find some part time job flexible enough to fill in all my gapz... initially i was depending on the part time courier opening at DHL.. too bad, they wanted long term courier, not juz for the hols... (i juz took a look at my timetable, shit, 2 days got lesson will 530, 1 till 630... wonder if they mind me working only 3-4 days a week...shld i try apply again?)

anyway, after tat subsequently got lobang still.... say bring parcels overseas....so good! plane tic and accomodation provided leh!! of course i grab lah....Knn.... till now already 3 weeks after i gave my passport details....dunno got kena cheated anot... not news still... but heng i know this person one...

then cousin intro me to this girl...intro as a biz associate, nothin like SDU...Im taken btw....at first i tot this girl is already the one who wan to look for ppl to work.... chii!! juz tat she got some lobangs lah....and it's not even very good lobangs... work as waiters leh... then help it's not helping much like tat....okok...got lah she got intro to me where to sign up, how the work is like blah blah blah...... but know wad's holding me back? i dunno....not very sure myself... but i know i dun realli like to work as waiter... the attires and stuffs... plus im not sure abt the work week.....yes i know im procrastinating....i know i know!! i can ask but i din!!

and partly i know it'll be troublesome.... coz i got lots of things lined up... ICT, Tahan Trek, ATC, my trainings for the above mentioned... so i can only work for like only 3-4 weeks...and only on weekdays... how to find job like tat??

all these became fuel for today's arguement with yan... i know such a mentality of mine, being procrastinating and all... being carefree not wanting to put in effort to find a part time job to do.... can put any girlfriend into feeling insecure... but is it tat serious as in telling me that she'll choose bread over love? i mean...it's not like in future i'll be like tat too! i won't haf my constraints then mah... unlike now... and i can put everything i haf into job hunting and staying on a job mah... how can compare like tat?? im pushing my luck for this few weeks...coz i know i can afford to push... but in the future how can i push my luck forever?? of course i won't.... maybe it also a period of time of the month when she's thinkin too much....dunno...

finally i cant take it le... i tried my luck at msn again.... wtf... rongyang, aka Xiao Mian Yang got lobang in his workplace... it's a perfect job for me! half day shift! then i can carry on my training le! plus XMY and me r both joining ATC and Tahan trek....if he's free, then i'll be too!! he gave me a contact to call tml....rather...later.... hopefully i can start soon....

let's hope my luck starts turning ard soon.....this is getting on my nerves....why cant i haf a smooth sailing one like px....? everything more carefree and bright... got lots of pocket money... tuition lobangs all high-paying... complete with a gong-gong gd bf....sigh....